Is there anywhere in the world that there is a dinosaur that can drive a car? Or even a mushroom with red polk-a-dots? I’m pretty sure that these kinds of things are not even eligible to obtain a driver’s liscense much less own pretty impressive karts to race. Someone should of thought of these barriers and the ability to cross these barriers beforehand. I understand it’s Mario world, but whoever thought of Mario world was trippin balls on something big time. That sure would be a sight for sore eyes… a bunch of 5’3″ Asians sitting around passing the bleezie and drinking the bong water as they proceed to make meth out of their rice cooker. I want  to party with them!!  Back to Mario world, the characters are cah-razy. To think up air conditioning units with smiles in the water that can only swim like jelly fish is a pure genius. Those who thought up anvil bullets with crazy smirks on their faces… brilliant! I wouldn’t even know where to start to come up with something even half as good as Mario. The concept of Mario is just so trippy. MARIO, F-YEAH!!! YOSHI, F-YEAH!!! LEAFS THAT WHEN YOU EAT YOU BECOME A GUY WITH A RACCOON TAIL THAT CAN ONLY FLY WHEN YOU RUN FOR A LITTLE BIT AND GET YOUR POWER BAR UP “P” AND THEN ONLY AFTER THAT CAN YOU FLY FOR A SOLID 7 SECONDS, F-YEAH!!! 

Mario, he’s a good guy… and that princess toadstool ain’t half bad either (except that she is stupid enough to keep getting kidnapped and taken to a different level only to write a letter to Mario telling him that she has been taken to another lever. That slut!!)

Warning: Those unfamiliar with Mario Brothers / Duck Hunt, Mario 2, Mario 3, Mariokart, and Mario’s World may have absolutely no idea what I am talking about in the previous xanga entry as I reference each Mario “world” throughout entry. This warning should probably go up at the top, but shit will buff out!


  1. surferdude0313

    hey you forgot the giant monkey who some how fits on two the tiny cart of them all or mario’s neglected brother and evil brother, lugi and wario the two best charcters, well not really lugi but he is tall and has a moustache so thats cool by me

  2. Anonymous

    hey randomly came across your site. but i was thoroughly impressed with your philisophical insight to Mario games. I clearly am not as much as a fan as you are, but I do enjoy that crazy Italian. – Katie

  3. dajukie7

    This is why i was originally going into the plumbing business before i stumbled apon this college thing.  You get sweet play from princess’ have the ability to shoot fireballs, and can get that a sweet frog suit to wear on halloween.  Unforunaetly, on itilian plumbers get the fruits of their labor, while we are left showing partial ass crack, bumber.

  4. Anonymous

    I’m from Reading, it’s about an hour from Philly, like 45 minutes. I’m sorry I have no idea where Stillwater, Oklahoma is..but it sounds…fun? lol – Katie

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